I Almost Didn't Rewire My Brain

Here's How I Overcame My Objections

I almost didn't rewire my brain.

And because I almost didn't rewire my brain, I almost didn't stop most medications, graduate high school, walk hundreds of miles, travel for enjoyment, and begin my virtual assistant business.

Let's consider my objections and how I overcame them.

Objection #1

I'd heard too many times that if I just took/did ___ I'd be much better or healed. I'd lost count of the number of treatments I’d tried. Out of desperation, I'd even took chemotherapy for my severe case of Mast Cell Activation Syndrome. I was still sick. Increasingly, I was becoming skeptical of treatment recommendations, especially from people who weren't doctors.

Objection #2

A doctor diagnosed me with a strain of a tick-borne infection, Babesia odocoilei, that had just been discovered. I was one of the first people in the United States to be tested and diagnosed. I was willing to believe what he told me about treatment, especially since he was treating his daughter for the same infection. He gave me some hope, and I fully embraced the mindset of needing to kill the bugs with long-term treatment to get better. I was even helping my doctor write a paper about Babesia odocoilei that included my case history.

Objection #3

Some people had hinted that maybe my illness wasn't as bad as I said it was. One of the most frustrating things about my illness was that I looked “good.” People told me that all the time. I'm sure most of them meant well. Besides for being obviously underweight for a few years and having a puffy face at times from steroids, I looked fairly healthy, and my smile hid a lot. But people couldn't see the pain, nausea, headaches, fatigue, fevers, insomnia, brain fog, and more that lurked under my skin. At the beginning of my illness, an allergist told me that I was simply an anxious teenager and to go home and eat the foods I told him were making me sick. Years later, when a nutritionist suggested I rewire my brain, I shot it down. I didn’t understand that brain rewiring didn’t imply that I was making my illness up, and it didn't help that she ended up being a shady character.

Objection #4

I didn't think brain rewiring was Biblical. I believe that we live in a fallen world and that pain and evil do exist. I thought brain rewiring programs were implying that these things weren't a reality and that instead they were a matter of how I was perceiving the world. It also bothered me that all the brain rewiring programs I'd found made no mention of God on their websites. They talked about harnessing the power within me to change. Some of the programs made me feel like they were saying I was God and could manifest anything on my own if I just thought it would happen. I'm a Christian who believes God is in control of all things and that I can do nothing apart from Him. I dismissed brain rewiring as a weird New Age thing.

So what changed? How did I overcome my objections?

In January of 2023, I became ill with COVID-19 for the second time. I'd seen some improvements with Babesia treatment and hormone replacement therapy, but as my body dealt with COVID long-haul symptoms, those improvements were slipping away. My doctor was recommending an antibiotic treatment that I felt uncomfortable with. I had tried this particular treatment before. It had made me much worse. I told him “No” and thought back to a letter I'd received a few months prior.

I was a writer for a magazine for Christians with chronic illnesses. The editor of the magazine was an Old Order Mennonite, the type that uses a horse and buggy. I'd mailed her articles about my story, how my faith in God was sustaining me, and what I was learning. I'd shared about my diagnoses of tick-borne infections, Mast Cell Activation Syndrome, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, and Adrenal Insufficiency, and she replied that she had been diagnosed with the same things. What had helped her was a brain rewiring program called the Dynamic Neural Retraining System (DNRS). She wondered if it would help me.

Old Order Mennonites are strict, and I don't agree with them on everything. But the fact that their religious beliefs make them uncomfortable with so many things, and yet my friend felt comfortable with brain rewiring made me reconsider. My belief that it was unbiblical had been the main objection holding me back. Plus, my mom’s doctor had also recommended DNRS for me.

I was finally willing to give it a shot. We bought the program. I watched 12 hours of video instruction, and for the past two years, I have used self-directed neuroplasticity principles to rewire my brain. With focused consistent practice, my life has changed.

If I could go back in time, here's what I would tell myself.

Dear Younger Me,

You are not lying about your symptoms. They are real. You are not crazy. I'm so sorry that so many treatments have not worked for you but keep an open mind. There is hope. Just because you've been very sick for a long time doesn’t mean you'll be stuck in bed for the rest of your life.

Brain rewiring helped me a lot, and I believe it can help you. It is based on science. Our brains are neuroplastic. They can change. It's because of neuroplasticity that people who have strokes are able to learn to walk and talk again. It's because of neuroplasticity that you learned how to write in cursive and ride your bike without training wheels. Your brain learned how to coordinate those movements, and each time you practiced, your brain strengthened neural pathways that made them easier.

What you've heard called “brain retraining” or “brain rewiring” is Biblical, and God made our brains so that our thoughts play a role in how our brains will respond. You know how your mouth starts to water when you start thinking about something really delicious? You know how you feel shaky and get a little red when you think you're in trouble? That's thoughts triggering sensations in action! God knows that what we think about is important. In the context of interpreting life through the lens of God’s Word and the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, He tells us to “be transformed by the renewal of your mind” in Romans 12:2.

You are correct that we live in a fallen world where pain and evil exist. But while pain is inevitable, suffering is less about what happens to you and more about how you respond. Just because bad things happened to you doesn't mean you need to be held back and stuck by a narrative you have believed about them. The hard thing that happened to you doesn't need to be viewed as THE thing that happened to you and that determines how you feel and act the rest of your life. You can reframe it as A thing that happened and look for the beauty and goodness around you. Joy is also less about what you have and more about the response you choose.

You're also correct that God is ultimately in control, but He gave us the ability to rewire our brains, just as He gave us the ability to digest food, heal from colds, and make decisions. I used visualization, redirection of thoughts, incremental training (where I'd expose myself to a trigger while simultaneously signaling safety to my body), and mood elevation to rewire my brain to no longer react to foods that used to make me very sick. I rewired my brain to stop sending inappropriate signals for things such as chronic pain. I rewired my brain to be calm in situations that used to make me anxious. My brain was stuck in a trauma loop, and it was signaling for me to feel sensations that I didn't need to feel. My brain was stuck in states of flight, fight, and freeze. The original trauma that made me go into those states had passed. The limbic system in my brain just needed some help to know that and to feel safe again. So yes, there is power within you to heal, but only because God gave you that power. Rewiring your brain depends on you doing the work. While God will give you the strength (Philippians 4:13), this isn't something anyone else can do for you. You have to be the one to take action, and I know you will. Your life is about to change in big ways!

Love,

Older Me (who is still young and now much healthier)

Thanks for reading. While DNRS was the first neuroplasticity program I used, I have also benefited from Sarah Jackson’s RESTORE and Dr. Lee Warren’s podcasts and Substack. I especially appreciate that Sarah Jackson and Dr. Lee Warren are Christians. DNRS does not have any faith-based components, and while the practices did not conflict with my faith, I have also found prayer, spending time with God, and reminding myself of His promises and who He says I am to be an important part of my healing. Lastly, I know that not everyone has had the same level of improvement as I have from brain rewiring. This article is not meant to shame you in any way! Brain rewiring has been a key part of my healing, but eating healthy, exercising, and taking some supplements and hormones have also helped me. I believe that brain rewiring can help anyone, but sometimes there are other factors that also need addressed.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, therapist, or medical professional. The content in this post is not medical advice.